Archive | September, 2013

To Hook-up or Not to Hook-up…

11 Sep

Just wondering what other Christian women think about the latest media trend about young people hooking-up, or having casual sex? I realize that hooking-up among young people is nothing new, however, I recently learned that hooking-up has slighted changed among this generation of young people. As a relationship writer and advocate for marriage, I was appalled at how mainstream hooking-up has become. Questions that flood my mind include: 1) what happened to wholesome values and young ladies not wanting to be viewed as a loosey goosey, or a whore; 2) is anybody out there concerned with the spread of social diseases and HIV; and 3) has anybody considered the emotional repercussions of “hooking-up”?

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I have read varying opinions on the hook-up culture and there are some who think the hook-up phenomenon is really an exaggeration – that young people are not hooking up as much as some people think and certainly no more than their predecessors in the 1960’s, 1970’s, 1990’s or 2000’s; and then there are those like me who absolutely believe that young college aged adults and teens are indeed casually hooking up more now-a-days. I recall during my college years in the 1990’s that there were some who “hooked-up” every now and then or went out for what we called “a booty call” but for the most part the desire was to be in a committed relationship. My understanding of relationships now among college students is that hooking up with friends, acquaintances, or even strangers appears to be more socially acceptable than when I was in college.

The attitude towards a committed relationship during my college years was perhaps fueled by the rapid spread of HIV/AIDS and our limited knowledge of the disease and how it was contracted during that time. This was during the time that Magic Johnson revealed that he in fact was HIV positive. While in college, I recall us students actively discussing safe sex practices and monogamous relationships.

Now, some twenty years later – guess I’m dating myself here – I’m quite taken back at young people’s attitude towards hooking-up and casual sex. Is this lackadaisical attitude the result of the fact that most STD’s are treatable and that people are now living longer and stronger with an HIV and AIDS diagnosis? Has pop culture made being loose or as we called it being a whore, something to be proud of? Maybe so, when you think of the number of female celebrities who proudly broadcast the fact that they have made a sex tape or began their career as a stripper and/or exotic dancer and these sorts of revelations have helped propel them into super stardom. And finally, the emotional repercussions of hooking up: is the walk of shame no longer there? Maybe it isn’t, but a recent study has shown the correlation between hooking-up and signs of low self-esteem and depression; with women being negatively affected more often than men.

I’m curious, what do other women in ministry think about this? I’d love to hear.

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A hookup culture is one that accepts and encourages casual sexual encounters focused on physical pleasure without necessarily  including emotional bonding.It is generally associated with Western late adolescent behavior and, in particular, American college culture.The term hookup has an ambiguous definition because it can indicate kissing or any form of physical sexual activity between sexual partners.  Source: Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

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